About Embracing 2015

2015 is the first year where I actually understand that everything is up to me, and that the following months will be what I decided them to be. No more waiting for god-knows-what to knock at my door. 

I don't think it's cliché to associate January to fresh starts and new commitments, as it is probably the time of the year where it all seems easier. After a long month of indulging ourselves, January and its ever-longer days appears to me like that necessary slap on the face to make me actually do something. This is why, every where, I genuinely think about good resolutions to stick to.

However, no matter how hard I try, I just can't remember my resolutions for 2014. Last January was pretty dull and I wasn't in the bestest of moods. This motivates me even more not to let myself sink this year, so I came up with these simple resolutions:

- Doing Stuff: I hate reading. I haven't read many books, and when I do, it takes me ages anyway. It's just very, very hard to catch my attention for more than one minute. I am then challenging myself this year to go to the library to actually read and not just hanging out in the café admiring bookworms from afar. I'm starting with 'In Bloom' by Matt Haig and really got into it! 

I love writing, but I have a major issue with my consistency, which is one of the reasons why I started this blog. Plus, I bought this gorgeous notebook from Hema, god of stationery, the other day in Lille. 

I have a piano at home but I can't play. My little brother taught himself and in a few months, he started to be really good (he's a fast-learner though). So I thought I'd give it a try as it's one of my favourite instruments, and there's plenty of tutorials on YouTube! I'm learning Ingenue by Thom Yorke at the moment, such an amazing song. I also want to play the guitar more. I've been playing since 2008 and singing as well but I don't believe in what I do and that's a huge handicap. I want to stop worrying and play because I love to.

- Dealing with my Fear Of Not Being Good Enough: this has been a major obstacle in my life for way too long now. Mandy, an amazing British blogger, made a very good blogpost about it that I will link for you to read. I close my eyes and see all the millions of things I would love to achieve. I open them again and it's dark. I am a dreamer, a graduate and an art enthusiast. I am in my early twenties and there's millions of things I would love to see, do, create, manage, achieve, rearrange... Though so far I've always felt like I don't fit. I don't know where I want to be, where I have to be and question everything I do. I am terrible at making decisions and never have a minute of rest amongst all that anxiety.

I want 2015 to be a year of meeting new people and finding inspiration everywhere I can. Lack of self-confidence and anxiety are things way too many of us deal with, I am not alone. I had time to think about it, now it's time to do something about it. I hope that, in a few months, I will come back to this article with a proud smile on my face. 

Here's to another year, let's make it a good one.